On February 4th, I suffered massive pulmonary embolisms and cardiac arrest that landed me in the hospital for over a month. At first, I wasn't expected to survive, but I did and have been left with deficits where I lost memory from days before I died for those six minutes and don't have any memory return until five days after waking up from the coma/sedation they placed me in. My body was in poor condition that I wasn't meant to survive and everything was in failure, but somehow I survived. I had an anoxic brain injury which causes me ataxia, which is hard to deal with. I have seizures and I am on medications for now that I never had before and had two seizures while awake and it was, no IS, the scariest thing to ever go through, feeling trapped in your body and begging for help but you can't speak as your body jerks. I had to relearn how to talk again because I couldn't form words or wasn't understood. I had to learn how to sit at the edge of the hospital bed without falling over and used the rail most days to help me sit up. I had to learn how to walk all over again with a walker that “I had a death grip on” when I could finally start taking steps. But I have a wheelchair because I tire out, put forth all my effort, and even use a cane like I'm being taught in physical therapy. 

I found out my mom lost income because while I was hospitalized she can't care for me as she is my care taker. Things also got messed up with my release dates and it took a while to figure things out but rent could not be paid because she wasn't caring for me. What we got figured out we sent in but it wasn't enough and unfortunately we are facing eviction at this point. I sit with exhaustion upon me through my recovery, depression because my life has dramatically changed where I am no longer independent, more medical PTSD upon what already was, I feel completely guilty and at fault for all of this. I know it was a medical emergency and no one could have seen this coming but the thought of losing my girls (my dogs) hurts. 

Before all of this we were okay just dealing with my medical issues before a medical emergency. Everyone keeps telling me its NOT my fault because it isn't but the guilt is there. Especially because now with this month we are behind $4100 and has kept the landlords updated who “sympathize” but unfortunately we haven't anyone who can lend us the money. I am asking for help and donations of any amount that can help us keep our home while I continue my recovery which is a long and rough one.