On Christmas Day 2025, my step mom of 42 years, Debbie Hobbs, lost her battle with cancer and an underlying chronic autoimmune disease, lupus. In the midst of the grief and pain that my dad, brother and I feel is all the logistics that come with death. Funeral planning, financial planning, closing accounts and more, all of which we tried to plan for. Despite the steps we’ve taken to prepare, we are unable to give Debbie a funeral due to the overwhelming expense that comes with it. Her and my dad had started a life insurance policy 16 months back but since she didn't make it the full two years it takes to be fully vested, they will not pay out the policy’s full amount, which is $4000, instead landing on about a  $700 benefit. So now it comes down to my brother Chad's family and mine to figure out how to pay for the procedure of death that must be paid for and cannot be bypassed (cremation and funeral home services, of which there’s a list of line items that are, in effect, mandatory) as well as do our best to give Debbie the sendoff she deserves, which unfortunately we don't have the extra money to help. 100% of proceeds will go towards these two things, we aren’t asking for any more. We normally wouldn’t be the ones to ask for help and we like to keep to ourselves but Debbie deserves this so we put our pride aside and we’re setting up this fundraiser for funeral home services and a celebration of life that will be held on January 24th, 2026, two weeks prior to Debbie’s would be 65th birthday.

I feel the need to give little back story because while we can never be fully prepared for something like this, circumstances leading up to her death made it even harder for my father to set anything aside. 2 1/2 years ago Debbie suffered a stroke which left her paralyzed on her whole right side and impaired her speech. We were told by the Doctors at the time that we’d effectively lost her, and she’d never move or talk again. However, being the fighter that she is, she made a miraculous improvement and regained function of her left side and her full ability to talk. She walked again, but was mostly relegated to wheelchair use. Doctors said the bleeding in her brain was caused by undiagnosed lupus. This meant that she had a higher likelihood of having another stroke. She never complained. She never blamed God. We all prayed for her wellbeing. Her condition meant that she needed around-the-clock care. In order for her to stay in the comfort of her own home, my dad took early retirement from his job at age 64 to care for all of her needs. This early retirement meant less money via social security, and Debbie was denied SSI despite her condition of 100% disabled. At this point they set up her life insurance plan in preparation, even as co pays for her continued care would adding up. Her and my dad were able to get out to see their grandkids play sports and went to parties in the park as free forms of entertainment to get out of the house. Then in June 2025 Debbie got sick and was diagnosed with Large B cell Lymphoma. Being the fighter that she was, she chose to fight for life despite her limitations from her previous stroke and went through 2 aggressive rounds of chemotherapy. It’s hard to express what my dad had to do to facilitate her care but he did, neither of them complaining. Halfway through the second round she was told that her PET Scans looked really good and oncology was optimistic that her cancer was in remission. Around Thanksgiving of 2025 she developed shortness of breath and a cough and was brought to the hospital. There she was diagnosed with pneumonia and sepsis, she was admitted to the hospital to be on antibiotics and oxygen. Throughout her four week stay at the hospital, her stability went up and down. Just when we thought she was improving, she would take two steps back. My dad had asked Chad and his wife Amanda, and my wife Sarah and I to come to the hospital and meet with the physicians caring for her to discuss next steps. In this discussion it was determined that over the last couple weeks she had developed masses on her brain that they believe was her cancer returning. We were devastated at this news as we thought she was cancer free. At this point her body was too unstable to have any further testing and we all had to make some discussions of what to do next. After long conversations that included Debbie to the best of her ability, we all decided it was time to come home. We brought her home on hospice to keep her comfortable.  We hoped for two months but God had different plans and she was only home three days before she passed at 4:10 AM Christmas morning, the same exact time my son woke me up to ask me if Santa had come.  Between deciding to go home and her passing away, there was four days. This didn't give us much time to plan or figure out last wishes, only enough time to say goodbye. Last week we met with the funeral home to see what our options are and the best option would be to have a celebration of life at a different time to avoid the cost of a memorial or funeral.

We have set up this donation page to help with her cremation and celebration of life. Out of pocket expenses are estimated at $4500, with the largest portion being the cremation cost and the accompanying funeral home services that are unavoidable. We are asking in lieu of flowers or charities, that you’d consider donating to this fundraiser. As mentioned before, Debbie wasn’t fully vested in her life insurance policy so she won’t be getting the full $4000 benefits. They’re looking at receiving $700 from that plan and $250 from a social security death benefit at a later date. This leaves the remaining bill at around $4000 from the funeral home and we’re estimating $500 to pay for her celebration of life. The funeral home bill needs to be paid in order for us to pick up her ashes.

If you feel so obligated to donate, please know how appreciative and grateful we are for your help. Thank you.